Comcast Triple Play shuts down my offense

A blast at Comcast - My entire adult life includes deadlines for sports stories, and I have never missed one, no matter how sick, injured or temporarily insane I’ve been at the time. But Comcast made a good run at me Dec. 7, rerouting my “Triple Play cable,” killing my phones and internet and mother-in-law’s quest for a record-setting consecutive months streak of nonstop “Law and Order” reruns. What really deep-fried my pierogie was after fighting through the automated voice and getting an agent, I was told they would be back between 4 and 7 p.m., but not only did they not show up, they never scheduled showing up, as I discovered when I fought my way back to Bombay or wherever I landed and introduced myself in American smart guy satire: “How’s the weather there at the elephant car wash?” I’m currently writing blind with no internet, using offbeat and out-of-date word programs and thumb drives, but that’s how we professionals from the crooked media handle adversity.  

Torpedoing Temple - A prestigious Philadelphia university with incredible endowment from alumni contributions and people got jokes. The Owls were given no chance to beat Navy for the American Athletic Conference championship, but scuttled the Midshipmen. That thrust coach Matt Rhule into the limelight and a job at Baylor. Rhule looked like a Philly guy, so now he’ll look like a guy waiting for the subway at Baylor, where there is no Broad and Susquehanna. Mark May on College Football GameDay said, “Temple loses to everybody in recruiting.” May played for Pitt. “Hey Mark, how much are two tickets to Pittsburgh?”    

But we need you! - Back when I was coaching track at Cape and Bill Collick was the wrestling coach, young men in lunch lines knew they were sitting ducks waiting for flying saucers because one of us was coming with a recruiting pitch. I’m a leftover wrapped in foil from that time period believing if an athlete can help a team and is personally recruited by a successful coach, the kid should come join the team to help their friends win and become a part of the glory story of their high school. Many coaches posted a signup sheet and if a kid didn’t sign up by the cutoff date, then they couldn’t come out. Now there’s a nice personal touch. 

Departing Big House party – The DIAA state championship wrestling tournament will be moved to Dover this year because “they put in for it” and so the Senators are being given a chance to “make it happen.” I’m a biased guy, but it’s hard to beat Cape for its venue and support network of hotels and restaurants and morning strolls on the Boardwalk. The Vikings will host the Henlopen Conference basketball championship games between the Northern and Southern champions, so now the trick is to be in the game.  

Our town - Cheryl Blackman belonged to us all, and we all know the story of her playing Miss Piggy on roller skates in “The Muppets Take Manhattan” movie. “Town characters” are polygons of personalities, there was no one Cheryl and no one like Cheryl. Certainly there was more to Cheryl than selling Sea Witch tickets. One time coach George Glenn and I were walking the boards and passed her sitting on a bench with her feet not touching the boards. I told coach, “Look away, I don’t need 10 tickets to Sea Witch.” I pretended to do the “perp walk,” pulling my jacket up over my face. Cheryl said, “I see you, Mr. Pot Belly.” I thought coach would die from laughing. He sounded like a seagull over Thrashers. I went over and sat down next to Cheryl and the more I pleaded, “You hurt my feelings,” the broader she smiled, finally patting my belly and saying, “You want to buy some tickets?” I bought 10. I remember telling Tommy Coveleski that story and he said, “Oh no, big fat German guy.” “It’s big German guy, Tom, big German guy.” Tommy and Cheryl – a pair of Boardwalk Muppets here at Sesame Street by the Sea - they tied us all together, but for now we’re tangled up in blues. Godspeed, Miss Piggy. 

Snippets - Basketball coaches Freeman Williams of Caesar Rodney and Steve Re of Cape will present the family of Dave Robinson with a basketball painted in the school colors of both schools and signed by the players before the Friday night game at Cape. Dr. Dave remains at the Magee Rehabilitation Center in Philadelphia recovering from an injury to his spine after crashing his bike, but he is improving. Bill Collick and Brian Donahue just visited. Collick called Doc’s improvement, 1 and 9, they were very encouraged. See you at the game. Go on now, git!