Masquerade ball to raise funds to end Alzheimer’s Oct. 31

To raise funds to help end Alzheimer’s disease, a masquerade ball will be held at 5 p.m., Friday, Oct. 31, at The Wheelhouse, 7 Anglers Road, Lewes.

Spearheading the event is Lewes resident Richard Carlucci, whose mother, Hope Carlucci, lived with Alzheimer’s. She passed on July 4, 2016, at age 82. To honor her memory, Richard and friends have organized the fundraiser to support dementia care and research.

Attendees will enjoy live music, food, drinks and dancing, with proceeds benefitting the Alzheimer’s Association Delaware Valley.

For Richard, the masquerade mask has become a symbol of hope and a vehicle for helping. He said dementia can act as a masquerade mask — changing appearances, making what a person knows seem unreal or different.

When Richard initially began to perceive subtle changes in his mother, he brought her to live with him and his husband, JR Fentress. His mother was in her late 70s and had been very active. Now things had changed for her, and all their lives changed.

The couple combined forces to make sure things were covered. They found an adult day program that specialized in dementia for Hope to attend. They adjusted their busy schedules to accommodate needs. On Sundays, a companion would take Hope out so Richard and JR could enjoy a break.

“I loved my mother with all my heart. We were best friends,” said Richard. “While the business of caregiving was challenging, we made it work. We made jokes. We had fun.”

His mother’s geriatrician told Richard that dementia caregivers often pass away before their loved ones. When he felt his own health was suffering, Richard arranged to take his mother to an adult day care. He never begrudged the time and care given to his mother, but he also didn’t want her to become too dependent upon his help when she was capable of more.

“I felt like my mom died twice,” said Richard. The sentiment is a commonly shared one among dementia caregivers. Through the efforts of Richard and his friends, Hope Carlucci is indeed inspiring hope for the future.

To learn more, go to events.alz.org/fundraisers/richardcarlucci.