Your Body Has a Back Door to Escape Anxiety...How to Find and Use It This Holiday Season
Let me confess something: I love the quiet. Home. Soft socks. My own thoughts.
But when the holidays roll around, it can feel like I’m catapulted into another dimension, one filled with boisterous relatives, loud kitchens, and overlapping conversations. Some people thrive in that. I admire them. I… brace.
I’ve learned the hard way that I need a little more structure if I want to actually enjoy the season instead of just survive it. One of my goals this year is to build more capacity to enjoy human company, not by forcing it, but by preparing for it.
This brings us to the second stop in the Four Keys system that people used all over the world to try to stay sane. The Body, how to bio hack your system to get what you want.
The Biology Behind Holiday Meltdowns
What if I told you that your stress isn’t just emotional or circumstantial - it’s physical?
New research, including from HeartMath and emerging studies on the fascia, shows that this connective tissue - once thought to be just structural - actually plays a powerful role in our:
- Heart rhythms: Your fascia communicates with your heart via pressure and movement. Disrupted fascia can elevate heart rate even in a resting state. When you’re tense, it elevates your ticker.
- Brainwave activity: Fascia impacts cranial tension, which can shift your ability to think clearly, especially under stress. Faster brainwaves or “grinding” don't make you more effective.
- Hormonal balance: Chronic tightness in the fascial web can stimulate a stress response that keeps cortisol circulating. Dehydration and sugar exacerbate this. Sorry. 😉 Hydrate and stretch!
- Emotional state: Fascia is rich in sensory nerves - it holds memories, tension, and trauma responses in the body. Make a daily practice of box breathing, slowing, releasing deeply for 5 mins 3 x daily.
Your body isn’t just reacting to stress, sometimes it’s broadcasting it on all channels. Especially after the third glass of wine and when Uncle Bob starts in on politics (again), or when your family pushes the exact buttons they installed themselves. They know where those buttons are and they also had 3 glasses of wine!
So, how do you go easy on your nervous system, especially when you might have said the wrong thing at dinner or stayed just a little too long? Maybe you didn’t feel the appreciation you know you deserved, but still do yourself a favor and breathe, rest, walk, restore.
My 3 Best Tips to Enjoy More...With Less Stress
These are three tools I use and recommend to clients when the holiday circus rolls into town:
1. Know Your Limit (and Stick to It)
I plan ahead. One dinner, not five. Two hours, not until midnight. Why? Because the nervous system loves predictability. It can relax when it knows the plan. Research shows that decision fatigue increases cortisol levels, just deciding how long to stay at a party can burn energy. So decide before you go.
2. Preload the Calm
Before I walk into any gathering, I spend three minutes in Quick Coherence, a HeartMath technique involving slow, heart-focused breathing and recalling a pleasant memory. Studies show this practice boosts vagal tone (your body’s calm-down switch) and improves heart-brain communication. Translation: You’ll handle Aunt Cheryl’s unsolicited advice like a monk.
3. Keep One Ritual Sacred
During the season, I pick one tiny thing I do every day. A warm mug of tea at the same time no matter where I travel. Yoga, even fifteen minutes before I depart my room. A breath pattern. A 3-minute song and stretch. Why? Because repetition creates rhythm - and rhythm tells your body it’s safe. This helps recalibrate your stress baseline even in chaos. It’s like hitting "refresh" on your whole system.
The Back Door Into Calm
When people talk about biohacking, it can sound intense - ice baths, fasting, tech gadgets. But the truth is, the best hacks are gentle, consistent, and body-based. Your vehicle (body) is highly programmable. And during the holidays, giving it a little guidance - some structure, some care - can mean the difference between peace and panic.
You don’t have to dread the holidays. You can actually enjoy them, with a little science, a little structure, and a lot of self-awareness.
Wishing you a nervous system that stays regulated, even when Uncle Bob doesn’t.
Courtni Hale,
DE Life’s a Beach Counseling
