The road just traveled muddles the pandemic path forward

Hole in one - I knew something was wrong when an image of lawyer Bill Schab holding a bottle of Heineken in his left hand and making the No. 1 sign with his right appeared on my desktop. Lawyer Bill, the St. Joseph's Hawk and master of the flat-footed jump shot, would never buy Heineken when cheaper beer was in the cooler, nor would he advertise it as No. 1. There was another explanation. On May 17, Bill shot a hole in one on the fifth hole at the American Classic Golf Course, a nine-hole course open year-round in Lewes. The par 3 fifth hole is listed as moderately difficult. The course is located off Postal Lane, but don’t lose your mind if you lose your ball. A cool place. If I golfed, I’d play there every day.  

Holy trinity - Three people cruising pandemic parkland dribbling a basketball in search of game could be asymptomatic, false positive or true negative, or one person could be all three; let the theologians figure it out. Young athletes are coming out to play. Actually, they’ve been out for weeks. They are on basketball courts, wrestling mats, in weight rooms, on ball fields, and playing field sports that require balls and cages – the athletes bring both – and often there’s a dad nearby driving the pickup truck. I haven’t heard the term, “carrier of corona,” but I think asymptomatic means the same thing, while simpleton and asimpleton just mean one athlete has a psychological evaluation in his school folder while the other has yet to be tested.  

Nobody knows - I talk to people in the sports business – my business – from athletic directors to coaches, and, honestly, no one knows what is going to happen for fall sports practices, which are set to begin in August. There are just a few people charged with making tough decisions while the majority are like Eagles fans, a bunch of unhappy second-guessers with no leadership experience. 

Social distancing and no spitting - I rarely drink water, and I don’t spit. I have never spit on a playing field or gotten out of my pickup truck and spit on the ground on my way into Wawa. It’s amazing to me that in order to tighten down rules of engagement for sports in the pandemic, spitting is something that needs to be talked about. And social distancing is ridiculous for most sports and even more so for some, like rugby and wrestling. Most professional sports will be resuming by July 4 with players getting prorated salaries. Many are losing millions while still making millions. College football is likely to start up on time while minor sports are all at risk because they lose money. But take away those sports and those student-athletes are heading elsewhere, so you replace them with just straight-up students, and nobody wants that.

“Zackzilla” All-American - Zack Gelof, a sophomore third baseman for the Virginia Cavaliers baseball team, was recently named second-team All-American by Collegiate Baseball newspaper. According to virginiasports.com, “Gelof has started every game of his college career at third base including each of the 18 contests in 2020. He batted .349 with six doubles, two triples, five home runs and 18 RBIs. The second-year student led the ACC in total bases (47), slugging percentage (.746) and runs scored (24). Gelof hit five home runs, the sixth-most in the ACC, including two against then-No. 7 NC State on March 1.”

Snippets - Things that go fast are also dangerous including motorcycles, ATVs, personal watercraft and helicopters. Bushwhacking the trails is beautiful this time of year except for the ticks and chiggers, which are thick this spring. Channelling Trump: “Perhaps a Frontline flea and tick application on the back of the neck for humans would be a good thing. I don’t know, seems to work on dogs. I mean, what could it hurt? What do you have to lose?” I recently talked to a man whose late great-uncle ran on my 1976 Cape state championship track team. The not-so-young man had no idea what I was talking about. Now, that is a “gone too soon and quickly forgotten” story if there ever was one. Think of an athletic career like a basketball game. There's the fade-away, the step-back jumper and, lastly, career is over, hand in your uniform and good luck with your life. Virtual runs have avatars for athletes, but I see real people with GPS watches running, then submitting their times. Those cats are not virtual; they are real. I organized a Magic Mile competition on the new track at Cape in 1977. The winner of the women’s open was Muriel Selph, who ruled the fitness world around here before everyone and their grandmother started training for marathons. Last week Muriel’s great-granddaughter Mariah Little graduated from Margaret H. Rollins School of Nursing. Brandy Little is her mom, Cindy is grandma and let’s leave the rest out so more people can get mad at me. Go on now, git!