Scamalot!

While I certainly do miss her, I am grateful that my mom passed away in 2006, before the Internet became the morass it is today. It was bad enough that any random anonymous caller could (and did) keep Mom on the telephone for an hour. I can’t imagine what a financial pickle my mother would be in, were she to have been on the receiving end of scam emails. I feel so badly for my friends who are navigating this mess with their own elderly parents these days. 

And most disgusting of all are the creeps who call, pretending to be a relative in trouble (a nephew in police custody needing bail money, or a sister begging for $$$ to get home quickly from East Westvania).

Not to brag, but I bet I'm probably the target of more scams than you are. I’ve learned to spot them, but early on I nearly fell for this scary message: “I’m from Microsoft, and you have a computer virus. If you let me take over your computer screen, I will fix it for you.” My favorites are the sloppy con people who send you emails with fishy addresses like Yourbank@geemail.com; “Gee,” I don’t think so!

And lemme tell you, the tricksters are getting trickier every day. No more the easily-spotted, often misspelled pleas from Nigerian princes! No, with the help of A.I., the writing is smooth, and shows a very unsettling knowledge of their mark (moi). Here’s a recent email from one Carole M. Larson, Book Consultant (whatever the heck that is):

Hi Elise Seyfried,

 I recently came across Everyday Matters and was genuinely drawn to its warmth, humor, and grounded spirituality. The way you illuminate the sacredness of ordinary life parenting, aging, faith, and daily routines creates a deeply relatable and comforting experience for readers who are seeking meaning in the midst of everyday chaos.

Books like Everyday Matters tend to resonate quietly but powerfully over time. Rather than relying on trends, they find loyal readers through trust, word-of-mouth, and thoughtful discoverability especially among faith-based audiences, parents, and readers drawn to reflective, spiritually grounded nonfiction.

And, cleverer still, the famous writers who suddenly want to be my pen pal: Stephen King...Nora Roberts...George Saunders... how flattering that these busy, super-successful authors have time to reach out to little old me with the digital hand of friendship!

Much like the flim-flammers of old, the 2026 versions are quite charming, and poised to take full advantage of people's naïveté and good nature. Well, joke’s on them! I am both sophisticated and crabby! They won’t get one dime of the $59.72 in MY bank account!

Seriously, though, I dream of a better world, in which this type of individual uses their smarts for good. I can see a reformed con artist pretending to be our president, on a call to Putin, and actually ending the Ukraine war.

Forget that--no one on earth would believe Trump was suddenly a master negotiator.

Not even Mom.